Thursday, March 24, 2011
Where to go from here..
Lately I admit, I haven't had much to say of any significance. This blog has really just been my way to vent, (no matter how wrong or irrational at times)speak my mind and ultimately share my experiences with whom ever would like to come along. Recently though I'm rethinking it entirely. I know that I could easily go underground and go private with it but I honestly don't want to do that. I don't think I should have to either. I can't be responsible for the actions of others or how people perceive what I have written here. There are more than word here though. There are feelings behind these words. MY FEELINGS. I own them and don't expect anyone else to understand them any better than I understand them myself. To do so would be ridiculous. I can't make others value me or my adoption in the exact same way in which I do. So in reality, this whole thing(ie my blog) is a bit ridiculous if you look at it that way. It's rather vain and self absorbed. I haven't decided anything yet though..still pondering..
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2 comments:
Keep going, so important to get those feelings and thoughts about your life and experiences out there so that no-one can say it wasn't so, disagree or argue.These are your views, your feelings, your life no-one has the right to tell you that you are wrong.
The more who speak out the less others can say they didn't know.
Thank you for your kind words Von. Recently I have been going through a lot of my old posts and rereading what was written. In all honesty I see a jumbled mess at times. Truth is though, I write only when I feel like it or something compels me to do so. I guess it's no wonder this blog seems to be all over the place. Some might even say that my writing reflects how "unstable" I am. To those same folks I say this: when is a person EVER consistently the exact same emotionally? Unless you are a cold, heartless and unattached person, the answer is never. We all experience situations in life that help change, mold and shape who we are. We all experience loss at some point and time in our lives. When that happens I dare say we are not the exact same person we were before or after that experience.(Minus your textbook psychopath) I guess I would expect others to take a moment to step outside of themselves for one minute, look back at that one moment when they can remember being changed by a loss of a loved one and relive that in their mind. Ask yourself this: were YOUR feelings wrong/right in that sliver of time? And if your answer is "who cares?, who's to judge that?" or even something REMOTELY close to that, then you have just made my point for me. No one tried to deny you your feelings. Why should I be shamed out of expressing mine all because it makes someone else uncomfortable? If you don't like what is being written here, you are free to quit reading at anytime. But I'm NOT about to pacify someone else simply because they can't handle what is being written, and that they can't control me.
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