My mom's favorite flower, Bleeding HeartsI can honestly enjoy Mother's day. I know that may sound a bit odd considering what I have shared about my adoption journey. But for as long as I can remember, I have always really enjoyed Mother's day. I was always excited to see how creative I could be when it came time to pick something as a gift. Over the years however, I must admit my creative juices have dried up a bit. I find myself trying to top the previous year's gift. At my age, I'm lucky to get a good card picked let alone a gift. My 4 year old keeps me busy yet distracted from my task at hand. This year was no exception.
After weeks of scavenging a variety of websites, numerous magazine articles & a couple of trips to the local mall searching for some ideas, I decided on something simple. The gift of relaxation. I know that sounds a bit odd, & unoriginal, but it's what she really needs.
My mom is & always has been, one of those superwomen. She's been the doting mom, the working mom, the "do-everything-with-a-smile-so-they-don't-see-how-stressed-out-you-really-are mom, the ever supportive mom, the "tough love" mom, the stay at home mom and for the last few years, the single workaholic mom.
I never thought that I would see the day when my mom became the workaholic mom. In all honesty, it snuck up on her. Mom use to work part time while taking care of my sister & I. After my parents got divorced, she went back to work full time instead of taking child support from my dad. (Especially since it was $200 a month for 2 kids.) Gradually, overtime became just part of the job. Even as I grew up & moved out on my own, mom still worked as hard as ever. I never felt as if mom was picking her job over her children. The reality is, my mom is phenomenal at her job. She's a nurse.
Mom's bedside manner & the way she connects with her patients is amazing. She genuinely cares about her patients & tries to make each & every one feel more comfortable. Her specialty though is 2 things: kids and starting iv's. Every time there is a young patient on the schedule, my mom is who the doctor's ask for. She has even had parents ask if she was working a specific day before they schedule their child for an operation. I find that amazing! Then there is her intravenous skills.To be quite blunt, my mom could start an iv on an elephant in the dark with one hand tied behind her back. Well, maybe not the last part but you get the idea. The best thing about my mom & her abilities is that she is humble about them. She says she her abilities are a gift from God. I think she's being a bit modest, but whatever the case maybe, she is not one to brag. I really respect my mom for that. In this day & age it is refreshing to see such humility. Fast forward to today..
After all of my ideas slowly dwindled down to nothing, I went simple. What does mom really need or want? The answer was an overwhelming "nothing ". Suddenly I remembered her saying something about wanting to get her hair done. That was it! I would set up an appointment for her & I to do just that. We could get in some "girl time" alone without my son. (As much as I love him, I really need some adult interaction every now & then!) So that is what we did today.
As I sat talking to mom about a variety of things, I realized how much I had missed our girl time. Sure we have more than enough opportunity to do so. Honestly though, I know how much my mother enjoys spending time with my son. Her face literally lights up at the mere mention of him coming over to spend the night. So I cave in, and give her what I know she wants; her grandma time with him. I have to admit, at times I get a wee bit jealous. That all subsides though when I see the love my mom & son share. Each time they come home, I get a rundown of the day's events from BOTH of them. I often wonder who has more fun & who is the child? The energy boost my son gives my mother is almost electric. It is not only visible on her face but in her spirit as well. She always seems to leave my house with an extra swing in her step.
As mom & I drove home, I didn't want the day to end. I couldn't help but wonder if this is how my son feels on his numerous return trips home. I'm pretty sure it is. Now I wasn't so jealous. As I got out of the car my son came rushing out to greet us. Only this time, he ran to me first. I felt my heart melt a little bit. It was good to know I am still number 1 in his book.
So this Mother's Day I want to take the time & recognize my mom not only for being a mom, but my best friend. Thanks mom for everything you do & sometimes for the things you don't do. (Inside joke there!) I had this poem e-mailed to me today & I couldn't get over how appropriate it is.
To do all the things you did,
To be teacher, nurse and counselor
To me, when I was a kid.
Be a chauffeur, cook and friend,
Yet find time to be a playmate,
I just can’t comprehend.
That made you come whenever I'd call,
Your inexhaustible love, Mom
And I thank you for it all.
