**CLARIFICATION**
After receiving a variety of comments, it seems I need to be more clear here.
I have no problem "linking" but the issues seems to be I have quite a few folks who are either:
1. Adoptive parents "advertising" themselves looking for another child
2. People who are using my blog as an example of "the unstable & angry natural parents". I know I can't control what others think about what I have to say or feel, However, I figured folks would ask before using my feelings to tout their own experience with adoption.
3. People who are "followers" that seem to be taking my words out of context.
I guess I was pretty naive to think that folks could look at my blog and see it as more than just words on a page. There are REAL feelings behind these words that are based on my own PERSONAL experience thus far. I guess I was naive to think that people could be respectful too..
10 comments:
I'm sorry. I had you linked on my blog roll. I have never heard that it was etiquette to ask before adding someone's public blog to a blog roll before. Only a few people have ever asked me if they could link to me, and that was for posting/quoting me in their entries, not about adding me to their blog roll.
I will take you off of mine. Let me know if you'd like to be put back on.
Amanda~
I have no problem "linking" but the issues seems to be I have quite a few folks who are either:
1. Adoptive parents "advertising" themselves looking for another child
2. People who are using my blog as an example of "the unstable & angry natural parents". I know I can't control what others think about what I have to say or feel, However, I figured folks would ask before using my feelings to tout their own experience with adoption.
3. People who are "followers" that seem to be taking my words out of context.
I guess I was pretty naive to think that folks could look at my blog and see it as more than just words on a page. There are REAL feelings behind these words that are based on my own PERSONAL experience thus far. I guess I was naive to think that people could be respectful too..
Amanda~I guess I should have stated these specifics first.. I have no problem with you linking me on your blog roll. I read a lot of what you right and respect you tremendously...
I had you on my blogroll too..I am sorry for not asking first. I can remove you when I get home..
@etropic, I to have you on my blog roll. And yes, I to have noted the links from the unsavory to the absurd...
I hope that you don't wish me to take it off, however, I will if you do.
I'm reposting my comment to Amanda in this blog post to better explain.
Oh ok. I just didn't want you to think I was trying to be rude :-)
Those are petpeeves of mine too. Especially when I find my link on a blog that is promoting adoption. Whenever I see it, I think "really?!...did they even read my blog?" lol.
..."Those are petpeeves of mine too. Especially when I find my link on a blog that is promoting adoption. Whenever I see it, I think "really?!...did they even read my blog?" lol.
EXACTLY Amanda!! I guess I need to get my rear in gear and post my entry about where I stand on adoption. Then that will leave no room for doubt...
Hey,
I have enjoyed reading your blog. I figured I would ask first if it would be alright to put you on my blogroll, even though I am not an adoptive parent nor would I be using your blog as an example of "angry/unstable nparents".
-Lisa :)
I received a comment from someone by the name of "Elizabeth". I had originally posted her comment before realizing she her stance on adoption. As a personal rule, I don't post comments that are in direct conflict with my stance on adoption. I figure that's my right since this is my blog and my own personal little space in the world of the internet. Here was the comment that was left:
I think it is actually a really good idea for you to make your blog private if these are your feelings about it. The truth is, there is no rule that people have to ask before linking to you, nor any rule that you can only link to something when it is relevant and appropriate to do so. No matter how mad you get about it, you can't force people to respect your wishes. The Internet is a free-for-all, and once you post something it is out of your control. It can be really hard emotionally to have something you created be out of your control, especially if you are already feeling vulnerable. However, unwanted links are *far* from being the worst thing you experience on the web. There are some very, very nasty commenters out there who say terrible things. If you can't handle the public forum, I really do suggest that you make your blog private. Trying to control what people do on the web is an exercise in futility.
Elizabeth~
You need to read what I said again as you have missed my point...
1. I never said there was some "rule" about asking before linking. My exact words were: "It is my understanding that it is considered good online etiquette to ASK before doing this." HENCE the word ETIQUETTE.
2. I'm not mad, I'm disappointed in yet again, people who have no common sense, tolerance, or respect for others.
3. Thanks for stating the obvious; "forcing people to respect your wishes and the Internet is a free-for-all, and once you post something it is out of your control." I wasn't aware of that at all! {insert sarcasm here}
I NEVER said I was trying to "control what people do on the internet" either. I simply said that if the things I mentioned continued, I would make my blog private. I do not feel vulnerable or fearful for sharing my experience one bit. I'm just disappointed to see what I have seen thus far from the same people who claim that "God" has blessed their plans to adopt. Their actions are NOT Christ like one bit...
There's no need to be sarcastic, actually. I was making what I thought might be a helpful suggestion, yours to reject if you like. There are lots of private blogs for personal topics, and I think there's nothing wrong with that. If it's not for you, great. Many will enjoy continuing to read you.
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